Quiz Team Names

6 Aug

Everyone loves a good pub quiz; it’s hard not to like them – a quiz, in a pub. What more could you want? What really gets on my nerves though is when people choose rubbish team names. A pub quiz is an ideal opportunity to express oneself; to choose a funny or witty team name that makes all the other teams around you jealous at your prowess. It’s as good as getting a few points head start. In my opinion, there are a few rules that should be adhered to when choosing your team name:

DON’T – have anything that could be classed as racist. Whilst you and your friends may think it’s funny, any quiz victory will be marred by your controversial team name. Having said this, there are a few exceptions to the rule which should make everyone chuckle; ‘The Abu Hamza Gloveless Wonders’, for example, is a good name.

DO – Go controversial and insult disabled people or midgets. Everyone will laugh at your team name and won’t feel bad about it like they could do with anything racist. ‘Jeremy Beadle’s Claw’ or ‘Cock Thrusting Midgets’ are names that will grab attention, and will get you remembered in pub quiz folk law.

DON’T – Use your surname, or a combination of everyone in your teams name, as your quiz name. This is just stupid. No one will respect any team called ‘The Greens’, or ‘John and Paul’. Use your imagination.

DO – Feel free to use animals in your team name. ‘The Exploding Ferrets’ or ‘The Bulbous Sloths’ are names that people will remember. I would heartily recommend combining both an animal and a place name for maximum effect, for example, ‘The Cunting Pigs of Poland’.

DON’T – Forget to incorporate famous people into your quiz team name. Nobody likes to be beaten by ‘Bruce Forsyth’s Anal Beard’ in a quiz. Similarly, imagine the pain and anguish you’d feel after getting a quiz twatting from ‘Kate Winslet’s Mangy Quim’. Fictional characters can also be used. ‘Deirdre Rachid’s Bike Pump’, a quick example.

DO – The most important one, be creative. I heard of a team called Dyslexics Untied, which I thought was a pretty good name. My own personal favourite is to call your team, ‘Currently In First Place with 94 points Actually 93 Points’. It leads to much confusion at the end of a round when the host reads out the current standings. For example,

“In third place are Currently In First Place with 94 Points Actually 93 Points, with 25 points”.

It confuses people.

Read Part 2: https://kylejwilkins.wordpress.com/2011/09/14/quiz-team-names-part-2/

One Response to “Quiz Team Names”


  1. Quiz Team Names Part 2 « Death On The Stairs - September 14, 2011

    […] Posts & Pages Take Me Out Part 2Quiz Team NamesOld SayingsComments OverheardTake Me Out Archives Select Month September 2011  (12) August […]

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