Tag Archives: beard

#MeAndMcQueen – Part 2

3 Oct

I arrived home from work and there it was; the jiffy bag containg Lightning McQueen. I hoped he’d be alright; it had been a long journey, but thankfully @JCautomatic had taken precautions:


McQueen is delicate after his years stranded in Oxfam

“What the fuck is that?”, were my girlfriend’s words as I carefully removed Lightning McQueen from his jiffy bag, closely followed by, “Oh God, no….he’s not going on the fucking window sill”. But he was, and it was there he sat and watched us until I had decided what to do with him. It didn’t take me long. First we went for a cigarette.

McQueen's first fag in years

Then we decided to get drunk.

My namesshh? Itsshh 'McQueen'

The rest of the night was spent snuggling up in front of the TV, we were too hammered to do anything else. I did take him the park the next morning to give him some fresh air and help him overcome his hangover.


He loved the swing the most.

Higher! Higher!

I had a great time and will miss the bearded wonder. Next stop is @_gAiL__

#MeandMcQueen – Part 1

2 Oct

Lightning McQueen: The man, the myth, the legend. A dedicated follower of fashion. An avid beard fan. A smile that could make an angel weep with joy. A Twitter icon.

I could go on, but I know nothing more about him. So how did Lightning McQueen become such an internet phenomenon?

When @cheekyricardo found McQueen in Oxfam, he couldn’t resist splashing out on what is surely a one-off item. McQueen’s days of gazing out of the Oxfam window, willing for someone to come and take him out of his bottom-of-the-shelf hell were now long gone, and a journey of epic proportions was about to begin. McQueen was about to be catapulted from charity shop wilderness into the big time.

Charity Shop Woe

McQueen's smile hides years of rejection

His first visit was to @JCautomatic’s salon. @cheekyricardo had previously sent JC a text message with an attached photo of McQueen in his Oxfam hell. After commenting on how ‘gruesome’ it was, @JCautomatic thought that would be the last he saw of McQueen. But he was wrong.

To JC’s suprise (and secret delight), @cheekyricardo left McQueen within a Sainsbury’s plastic carrier bag, in the salon after having his hair cut by JC.

McQueen - The legend

The pose of a confident man

@JCautomatic hatched a plan; he would let McQueen enjoy his new found freedom by allowing him to see the world. McQueen would be sent to and from various people on Twitter so he could see new sights, meet new people, and enjoy his final years. That is how I came into possession of Lighting McQueen. After a lonely, dark night, concealed in a jiffy bag which JC had carefully slipped him in, he arrived at my house, 286 miles away. Sadly, I was already at work, but a message from my girlfriend was enough for me to look forward to getting home even more than I already was.

Straight to the point

In part 2, you can see what McQueen and I get up to in our time together.

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